The Year Of Vulnerability

I can already feel myself hating you. You who keeps coming to me with the same problem over and over. You who is not ashamed to fail over and over again and come back to me, every single time to tell me of your bad habits. I am beginning to hate you. You who is not like me.

I am angry. That I am sure about. What I do not know is whether I'm angry with you or myself. With for failing in the same pathetic way. With myself for lacking:

For lack of courage to fail ceaselessly like you do and still rise up.
For lack of empathy towards you.
For lack of happiness.
For lack of patience.
For lack of love.

For hating you.

It makes me hate me.


PS. This is not what I expected to write for my first blogpost of the year. Not very sunshine-y, but can we really control the Muse and its dictates? Happy New Year All.