Love, Religion and Confusion

About a month ago my sister asked me whether I would date a man who didn't share the same religious beliefs as I did even if they had the same core values. I was completely certain that I couldn't. I argued that he couldn't have the same core values as I did if he wasn't a Christian. My sister was disappointed. My family has boasted to being the most open-minded family in Nairobi county, with the traveling and what-not, so this notion of mine seemed conservative and ridiculous. I just thought she couldn't get it because she doesn't subscribe to any religion.

Then I read The Obscure Logic Of The Heart. It's a story about a girl's struggle to reconcile her religious beliefs with her love for a man who doesn't share similar beliefs. I was taken on a journey where the couple had to make so many sacrifices and compromises in order to be together. The girl had to lie to her parents and was almost disowned by them, the guy had to tolerate the girl's indecisiveness. What mostly caught my attention was how the girl had to reconcile her beliefs (what her God thought of unbelievers- she was Muslim by the way) and her love for the 'heathen'. In a lot of ways she went against some of her principles, which I found a bit sad.

As I read the book I could help but ask whether I'd date boyfriend were he not a Christian. This was a tough question to answer after I put into perspective the depth of my feelings for him. I really do care about boyfriend and he is an great guy. But is it the religion that has made him who he is? Is it religion that has attracted me to boyfriend? I cannot say that it is religion that has fully attracted him to be. If that was the case, I would be attracted to many Christian boys. But there is an extent as to his love for God that has made me like him. I don't think I'll ever know. I will have to be in that situation to understand it. 

Anyway, I do love how the book ends:

Every conquest, loss or rejection leaves its trace. We love according to what the heart has been taught. We love in the shadow- sometimes benign, sometimes malevolent- of every disappointment, betrayal or fulfillment. We love- and no god can control the feeling or mitigate the consequences.

I guess the one thing that cuts across all of humanity is love. After objectively reading what I've just typed, it does make me squirm a but primarily because I believe that God is love and there is no way God would be against anyone loving another. That has been His mission since He created the world. And Paul in Romans 8:38-39 says it wonderfully:

38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.